Dear Zindagi..
It is 5th
November. I turn 34. 34! I believe that age is just a number, but then it also
means a little more time has been spent from what I have been allotted! I so
want you to stay with me for long as it turns out that I have learnt just
recently how to live you and I want to make most out of you and the fact that
you do end and unpredictably so scares me. You have always amazed me. You do
that all the time.
Once upon a time I failed
to understand you. I cursed you. Now that little bit of wisdom that you have
gifted me with, I have come to understand what you are all about. Now, I thank
you. I love you.
As I grow older, I do get
worried that my share of living is diminishing day by day but I also appreciate
the fact that with age you have given me the ability to discover your true
beauty.
You know what Zindagi, I
have always complained about the fact that you have been unfair to me, because no
matter what I planned for, you always had something else in mind for me. I have
hated you. You heard me right. I have hated you! When you took my father away
from me. No matter how in many more ways I now appreciate you but this stab is
going to stay in my heart always. You have no idea how my ears long for his
voice to call my name, how badly I long for one hug from him. You have been so
cruel! So ruthless!
But now I know, you are
beautiful too! That’s the way you are..
You have given me the
strength to fight the odds, courage to stand up for myself, ability to forgive,
made me capable of giving love and above all your greatest gift to me is
Realization!
You have made me discover my
inner self. What I am. What I stand for. You have given me the vision to
identify beauty and miracles in little things around me. You have been kind
enough to let me realize the things that really matter and eventually realizing
that those things aren’t actually things. Somewhere I read “there is a purpose
for everything that happens in your life.” Now I know exactly what it means.
Positive experiences give you happiness and negative.. lessons. Sometimes you
win, sometimes you learn.
Dear Zindagi, you won’t
see any more complaints coming from me. You have taught me to be thankful for
what I have rather grieve for what I don’t. How beautifully this Persian poet, Saadi, has summarized
one of your intricacies “I cried when I had no shoes until I saw a man without
legs!”
Our lives are full of
blessings, sometimes we just don’t know how to value them. Now I just count mine
and thank you for all the priceless things you have blessed me with. Every
morning as I wake up I feel fortunate that I am able to breathe, walk, smile..
I now know what to do with
you. LIVE. Live every single moment. Because Passing is your another name. As
in the words of Adlai E Stevenson, “In the end, it’s not the years in your life that count. It’s the
life in your years.”
What I have come to
understand of you is that you are all about fighting back, dedication,
motivation, perseverance, believing, having faith. You are full of pains and
gains, joys and sorrows, beginnings and ends, celebrations and remorse, rewards
and challenges. One has to live you, experience you. You are really short and
that’s what makes you invaluable.
Dear Zindagi, you have
also been the Best Teacher. As I reflect back, I realize I wouldn’t have been
what I am today hadn’t you thrown those tough times my way. You have your own ways
of making us better as a person which we often don’t understand. Like a
joystick, first you break to only let us shine! What I am today is all because
of you and I am really happy and proud of my new self.
I have also learned through
this journey so far is that sometimes it’s okay not to think, not to imagine or
to plan. Sometimes it’s okay to go with the flow while putting best of our efforts
and hard work and have faith that everything will work out for the best.
I have already spent
almost one-third of my time living others’ lives. What others would think,
would they approve of it, thinking about all the what-ifs’. But I do that no
longer. I no longer seek approval from others. I fight for what matters to me,
no matter what. I follow my heart. I live for myself. I do what makes me happy.
And all this ease eventually makes my soul happy. Please be the guiding star
and take me where my happiness lies.
There is no better way to
live than make yours the way you want it!
With Love,
Your Courageous Child
"I am writing a letter to life for the #DearZindagi activity at BlogAdda."
